Modesty. One of those topics I hate addressing in bible study.
Tomorrow night is a guys/girls split-off meeting again. Us gals have been plowing through Nancy Demoss’ Lies Young Women Believe and so far the topics have been relevant and great for discussion. This week we will continue the chapter on sexual immorality which brings up the issue of modesty. The basic point is that the general theme of sexual immorality encompasses many aspects of our mental and physical purity in addition to the act of sex outside of marriage – one area being a woman’s use of her body and dress to encourage sexually immoral thoughts in the men around her.
I feel like our group really needs a thorough, defining discussion about modesty and am glad this study is going to finally take us there. But I’m also dreading it. I know that a few of the girls haven’t actually ever been given good instruction on where to draw the line in their behavior and dress, and the topic of modesty is so much in the eye of the beholder that it’s a blurry issue to begin with. I am going to draw upon some modesty-related activities I experienced in campus crusade years ago to help give a guy’s point of view, but I am nervous about being the person that says “cleavage is a huge stumbling block for guys” while staring in the face of a girl that is exposing most of her endowment.
Thoughts?? Men – we need specifics. Do you have some specific guidelines for women on this issue?
If a guy can see it, he can imagine touching it. If you don’t want every guy you meet to touch it (even if only in his mind), don’t show it to him.
It’s a bit graphic and insensitive, but it is also (unfortunately) true. It is also part of what I plan on teaching my daughter as she grows to understand how her choices can frequently affect the lives of the people around her.
I’m reading this one a little too late, but if I had actually read blogs on Tuesday night, I would have asked my hubby for some thoughts. I do know that he has said many times that one of the things that attracted him to me was the fact that I did/do dress modestly
“Girsl, let’s say that you see something beautiful that you want… maybe a diamond ring or neclace. However, you know that there is no way you can afford it. Would you ask one of your male friends to steal it for you? Not only would that be a crime for him but it is also a sin against God. Of course you wouldn’t.”
“There is a story in the Bible about eating meat. It’s okay (for some) to eat meat but not okay for others. If you eat meat around a person knowing that it is a sin for them to eat meat you may cause that person to sin. In causing that person to sin you (yourself) have sinned against God.”
“Now knowing that God holds each of us accountable when we make others enter into sin, how does that affect the way you choose to dress?”
Sorry E-
I read your post too late too.
I think that a lot of people miss a major point in regard to dress.
Today having the guys ‘want to touch it’ is just the point.
It empowers the one giving the show.
Giving a sense of control over him…which withers after he HAS touched it.
Very thought provoking comments everyone!! We went through with the topic last Wednesday night and it went very well. I have much relief now that i’ve been obedient to introduce the subject (belated obedience, just call me Jonah) and I have a better understanding of how to continue the conversation should it come up again.
You all have some really solid things to say and i’ll definitely bring up your comments should we address the subject again. THANKS!!